Asher Shla'in

How to Be Your Own Best Friend

Sometimes, no connection with one's friends is available, or the present friends fail to deliver what one really needs. An important supplement can be found in the ability to conduct inner discourse, serving as one's own friend. This idea does not occur to many, because the support from without seems indispensable; indeed, the connection to one's inner resources is often impeded. Creating the image of an inner mate, if well applied, can prove quite beneficial.

Points for Discussion

(1)         What would you mean by 'emotional dependence'?

(2)         How can my friend(s) rely on me? Can I expect a similar support?

(3)         Being judgmental: why, when, towards whom? Compare judging of others with judging oneself.

(4)         What is the function of conscience? Should it make me feel guilty?

(5)         Is Guilt a necessary result of failed responsibility? What does responsibility involve?

(6)         Would my good friend ever punish me? How would I respond to my friend's iniquity? Should I use my power to punish myself?

(7)         Talking to oneself - is it weird?

(8)         "I remember my song in the night, I commune with my heart, and my spirit searched" (Psalms 77, 7).

(9)         How would I encourage my good friend? Who would do this for me? Can I play the role of my own encouraging partner?

(10)   Can I laugh in private at my folly? Possibly aloud?

(11)   Patting one's own back - is it conceivable?

(12)   Can I cry on my own shoulder? Can I find a consoling voice within? Could I direct a hug towards myself? Would it work?

(13)   Can I avoid deceiving myself? How can self-forgiveness help inner confession and coming clean of sins and errors?


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